Time for a deep breath...

It's amazing what this time of year has the power to do to our mood. On a day when the freezing cold would normally leave people feeling a little bitter, there is Christmas spirit floating around and warm smiles are painted on every face I see. I would normally wonder what is making them smile, as random smiling is not typical. However, with the joyful holiday right around the corner, I do not wonder why they are smiling. And even if I don't know exactly why they are smiling, I know why I am. This is something that I always know, which makes me smile even bigger. Today is my last day in the city for a few weeks. Although, this is not what's making me smile. I do love my home and the life I've created here in Chicago, so my excitement doesn't come from leaving my routine. My excitement comes from my destination; home. I felt the biggest sense of relief at about 8:00 last night when my last class ended for the fall semester. I always love completing things, and checking things off my list. But there's something about putting another chunk of education under my belt that makes me feel not only relieved, but proud. 

I often wonder what kind of person I would be if I wouldn't have taken the leap to move here and finish school. I don't think I would be as satisfied, or as appreciative as I am right now. Even though I dislike living far away from my family, the time that I do get to spend with them is much more appreciated now than it was before. And not only that, but I appreciate my surroundings more than before, not only in the city, but at home as well. I never thought it was possible to soak up my surroundings as much as I have in the past 6 months. Somehow, though, I made it possible and am glad I did. My time here so far has changed me, there's no denying that. And even though it may not show on the outside, I certainly feel it on the inside. I've proven to myself and to others that anything is possible. If you would have asked me a year ago if I thought I would be here today, I would say absolutely not. And then I would most likely ramble off a list of excuses why I couldn't do what I did, why it was simply not possible. This is the case for many of us. But we all have that one thing in the back of our minds that we hope to accomplish one day. For me, it was moving to Chicago to finish my education. It was finishing the part of my life that was incomplete and unfulfilled. Please take my advice and take the first step toward your one thing that will make you complete. And I promise, you will become a better person in the process. I can't say it's the easiest thing to do, as I had bumps in the road that I thought would prevent me from continuing on this road. But you learn to simply step over the bumps. You learn that the bumps in the road are smaller than they seem at first. And you learn that if you don't get over the bumps, one way or another, that you will not be satisfied with yourself. For some reason it was easy for me, making a change. I never took the time to look behind me, until now. I wonder why it wasn't more difficult. I wonder how fear and uncertainty didn't take control of me along the way, as they often did in the past. But this thought quickly leaves my mind and I realize that it was meant to be this way. I was meant to do this for myself, for my life; this is why it was so easy to make the transition. 

Although this isn't my last post of the year, it will be my final goodbye to Chicago for the year. A goodbye to my favorite Starbucks, where I currently sit, sipping on warm coffee and watching the morning bustle. A goodbye to the Christmas spirit that will return to me as soon as I am home. And a goodbye to another chapter of my life, assuming a new one will begin after the holiday dust settles. It's time for a warm resting period with my family. It's time to soak up the joy of the season. It's time to take a deep breath, get cozy, close my eyes, and just smile.