Just exploring...

As I near the end of yet another chapter in this book I opened over 8 months ago, I can't help but think about what I've learned thus far. And when I say learn, I don't mean only the concepts and terms that I studied meticulously during my time here as a so-called college student (a term that I apply lightly to myself); but I think about what I've learned about this life that I'm so fortunate to be a part of, something that I rank much higher than any educational lesson or term in a textbook. Yes, I do realize the previous sentence was extremely long, but that's what I love about my writing, I don't have to worry about structure or precision; I simply start typing, and what I'm thinking is what you end up reading. I'm okay with it if you are.


So one thing I've learned is that it is possible to force a smile. There have been many days where a fake smile is the best you'll get from me; after all, forcing a smile is better than frowning and typically it does lead to a real smile after realizing how stupid my fake smile looks and basically laughing at myself. But, I've also learned that there should be no need to force a smile; it's something that should come naturally and come often. If this is an ongoing problem for any of you, I would suggest literally sitting down and thinking about what it is that makes your natural smile appear. I know every single person has at least one thing, one aspect of their life that brings on this smile. Incorporate this particular thing into your life on a daily basis, even if it means giving up something else. Trust me, it's worth it. 


I've also learned that the best things in life are free. Corny, right? But whoever came up with this quote or saying or whatever you want to call it, was a total genius. There is nothing, that I can think of, that is more true than this. Call me boring or lame or anything else you want to call me...but I find that the most joy in my life comes from the simplest things. Such as quiet moments alone when I do nothing but stare out my window. It comes from smiling at a stranger on the sidewalk, even if no smile is returned. I find that a lot of my joy comes from being healthy and active and taking care of myself (but don't get me wrong, it also appears when I get my hands on some chocolate). It also comes from working hard and getting things accomplished. I find joy in sounds and smells. I find joy in thinking and feeling. All of these these are free; the quote stands true in my case. 


Another valuable lesson I've learned is that fear is lame. Fear is just something that was made up to consume your mind and your time, and to keep you from doing the things that will really make you happy. After all, we usually aren't afraid of actually doing anything...we are afraid of the outcome. We are afraid of failure in the end and we're afraid of disappointment in ourselves. Take my fear of heights for example. I'm not afraid of standing on top of a 10 foot ladder; what scares me is the possibility of falling. Now, when it comes to my fear of spiders, that's different. In that case, I am afraid of the little creeps crawling on me and either nesting in my hair or crawling into my ear or some other extremely creepy thing that they have the opportunity to do. Yes, that is legit fear of both the action and the outcome. 


Moving along. 


Before I bore you to death with my lessons learned (as if I haven't already crammed enough into your brain), let me tell you just one more thing that I've recently learned. Forgiveness is essential, and it is possible.Your options must be weighed; if forgiveness leads to happiness then the choice is as clear as day. I've learned that forgiveness does not change the past, but it does create a better future... (thanks big sis). 


There is much more to be learned in this one chance I get at life. In fact, let's call it an exploration...I have a lot more exploring to do.